You don’t have to be a mental health professional to help someone who is feeling suicidal; you just need to be able to listen. Asking directly about suicide is the right thing to do if you are worried about someone.
Many people fear talking directly about suicide in case they “give the person the idea”, but there is no evidence that talking about suicide can be harmful – quite the opposite in fact. For many people it can be huge relief to be asked the question in a direct way.
It is a myth that people who talk about suicide are unlikely to go through with the act. Anyone who talks or writes about taking their own life should be taken seriously. Never assume that a person who has spoken about suicidal thoughts before and not acted on those thoughts won’t do so this time.
Suicide can be a stigmatised subject, language is important i.e. ensuring we don't say things like 'commit' suicide
Very Brief Intervention
Ask
Be alert and aware
Not everyone who thinks about suicide will tell someone and there are some people who give no indication at all of their intention. However, there are warning signs that we can all look out for. These include, if a person is:
Talking or writing about death, dying or suicide.
Actively looking for ways to kill themselves.
Talking about feeling hopeless or of having no reason to live.
Talking about being a burden to others.
Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain.
Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs.
Suddenly very much ‘recovered’ after a period of depression.
Visiting or calling people unexpectedly to say goodbye either directly or indirectly.
Making arrangements; setting their affairs in order.
Giving things away, such as prized possession
The best way to help is to ask questions. That way you leave the other person in control. By asking questions, the person you are talking with finds their own answers.
Ask how this person is feeling?
Often people want to talk, but wait until someone asks how they are. Try asking open questions, like 'What happened about...', 'Tell me about...', 'How do you feel about...'
Repeat back what they say to show you understand, and ask more questions.
Focus on feelings instead of trying to solve the problem - it can be of more help and shows you care.
Respect what they tell you. Sometimes it's easy to want to try and fix a person's problems, or give them advice. Let them make their own decisions.
Be aware of verbal or physical cues of anger and/or emotional distress
Ask open questions like - When did you realise?
Where did that happen?
How did that feel?
Assist
If someone has been feeling low for some time it is probably a good idea that they get some support, whether it is through talking to someone like a counsellor or getting some practical help.
Useful questions you might ask them include:
Have you talked to anyone else about this?
Is there anything you did that helped you when you had felt this way before?
focus on coping mechanisms and protective factors
Would you like to get some help?
Or, for someone who is reluctant to get help:
Do you have someone you trust you can go to?
Have you had any suicidal thoughts/thoughts about taking your own life?
It's important to use word suicide, this doesn't plant suicidal thoughts or increase the likelihood of this happening.
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, its important to be direct and this can enable someone to open up and discuss feelings with you.
Do you have a Suicide Safety Plan?
if someone is serious about taking their life, it may help them to talk this through, it wont put the idea in their head and this does fit in with Safetalk/ASIST approaches.
Act
If you’re worried that someone is at immediate risk of taking their own life then phone 999, you should stay with that person until help arrives. Do not put your own safety at risk by getting physically involved.
If no immediate risk take the following steps:
Encourage them to ring:
Samaritans - (All age groups)
Tel: 116 123, open 24 hours a day.
Papyrus - (Young people)
Tel: 0800 068 41 41
Text: 07860 039967
Email: pat@papyrus-uk.org
Open 9am - midnight every day
Other options include:
contact their GP for an emergency appointment or call the out of hours service.
call their Mental Health worker, if they have one.
call their social worker or key worker, if they have one
encourage to re-engage with mental health services if already engaged
If they don’t want help, don’t push them. Sometimes it’s easy to want to try and fix a person’s problems, or give them advice but try and at least leave a couple of key telephone numbers with them for Samaritans any local support numbers for their area (Crisis teams etc).
It’s usually better for people to make their own decisions. Help them think of all the options, but leave the choice to them.
A person may not be suicidal but you may still be concerned
Encourage them to contact their GP, they will be familiar with their medical history and will be able to direct them appropriately which may include a referral to IAPT (Improving Access to Psychological Therapies). IAPT teams are skilled in helping people 18 years old and older overcome emotional and mental difficulties like:
All the local IAPT services are listed under the 'Mental Health' section of MECC Link and can be found within the 'local support and contact details' section.
SELF CARE
Hub of Hope - Postcode based directory of services
Mind 'The charity for better mental health' has an extensive range of self help resources available
TheNHS has has a range of self-help tools available
Andy's Man Clubprovides weekly groups, a place for men to come together in a safe environment to talk about issues/problems they have faced or are currently facing. There's a search function to find your nearest group.
Local Support and Contact Details
Please note that these are not crisis services.
If you have serious concerns for a person, do not leave them on their own and get urgent professional help:
from their GP
by calling 999
by taking them to the nearest accident and emergency department
Remember to make sure that you are safe and do not put yourself at risk.
Mind BLMK
A local mental health charity, with a positive and holistic approach to promoting mental wellbeing.
Mind BLMK also offer FREE suicide awareness training for those who live or work in Bedfordshire, Luton or Milton Keynes.
HeadsUp is a campaign to help men get happy and stay happy. It has been set up to help men identify and deal with issues that tend to crop up in life from time to time. The website also offers help and advice to friends and family, so they can better support the men in their life.
PapyrusYoung People's hotline available Mon-Fri: 10am-10pm, weekends: 2pm-10pm & bank holidays: 2pm-5pm
Telephone:0800 068 41 41
Text:07786209697
Email:pat@papyrus-uk.org
CAMHS - Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service
CAMHS provides outpatient assessments, support and treatment for children and young people up to the age of 18 experiencing moderate to severe mental health problems. The service works to provide them with a greater knowledge of their condition and improve coping techniques.
Self-referrals are not accepted. Referrals are accepted from your GP, health professional, social worker, teacher or youth worker.
Bedfordshire wellbeing service Bedfordshire wellbeing service offers a range of free and confidential talking therapies and specialist support to help you feel better. Self-referrals are accepted via the website or by telephone, or contact your GP to arrange a referral.
Bedfordshire and Luton recovery service Bedfordshire wellbeing service offers a range of free and confidential talking therapies and specialist support to help you feel better. Self-referrals are accepted via the website or by telephone, or contact your GP to arrange a referral.
Email: elt-tr.bedfordiapt@nhs.net
Please note that these are not crisis services.
If you have serious concerns for a person, do not leave them on their own and get urgent professional help:
from their GP
by calling 999
by taking them to the nearest accident and emergency department
Remember to make sure that you are safe and do not put yourself at risk.
Mind BLMK
A local mental health charity, with a positive and holistic approach to promoting mental wellbeing.
Mind BLMK also offer FREE suicide awareness training for those who live or work in Bedfordshire, Luton or Milton Keynes.
HeadsUp is a campaign to help men get happy and stay happy. It has been set up to help men identify and deal with issues that tend to crop up in life from time to time. The website also offers help and advice to friends and family, so they can better support the men in their life.
CAMHS - Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service
CAMHS provides outpatient assessments, support and treatment for children and young people up to the age of 18 experiencing moderate to severe mental health problems. The service works to provide them with a greater knowledge of their condition and improve coping techniques.
Self-referrals are not accepted. Referrals are accepted from your GP, health professional, social worker, teacher or youth worker.
Bedfordshire wellbeing service Bedfordshire wellbeing service offers a range of free and confidential talking therapies and specialist support to help you feel better. Self-referrals are accepted via the website or by telephone, or contact your GP to arrange a referral.
Bedfordshire and Luton recovery service Bedfordshire wellbeing service offers a range of free and confidential talking therapies and specialist support to help you feel better. Self-referrals are accepted via the website or by telephone, or contact your GP to arrange a referral.
Email: elt-tr.bedfordiapt@nhs.net
If someone has seriously harmed themselves dial 999 immediately or take them to the nearest A&E department.
If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health crisis, you can contact any of the free helplines below:
NHS 111 Option 2
A 24-hour service for people aged 18 and over who are experiencing a mental health crisis.
Phone: 111 and select Option 2
Samaritans
Phone: 116 123 for free any time of day or night, 365 days a year
The Suicide Prevention Network involves more than 20 organisations. Our vision is to make Hertfordshire a county where no-one ever gets to a point where they feel suicide is their only option.
Our countywide crisis services provide a warm welcome to our callers and visitors.
We offer emotional support, advice and information if you are feeling distressed and are in crisis.
Our Nightlight Crisis Helpline team is here for you from 7pm to 1am, every day of the year.
Our Nightlight Crisis Cafes* at Watford and Stevenage are open from 7pm to 1am every evening, seven days a week, 365 days a year. Our Crisis Cafe in Ware is open 7pm to 1am on Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday.
Our Nightlight Crisis House (crisis beds)* is in Hemel Hempstead and has four bed spaces that can be used if an overnight stay would help you to resolve your crisis. The beds are available (depending on capacity) seven days a week, 365 days a year.
* Please note that face to face visits and overnight stays are currently operating by appointment only, and accessed through the helpline, from 7pm. For referrals and voicemails left outside of operational hours please see further information on our Crisis Helpline page.
If you want to speak to us on the phone, or if you would like to come in and see us, simply give us a call on any day of the week at any time between 7pm and 1am on 01923 256391
If you have serious concerns for a person, do not leave them on their own and get urgent professional help:
from their GP
by calling 999
by taking them to the nearest accident and emergency department
Remember to make sure that you are safe and do not put yourself at risk.
Total Wellbeing Luton
Total Wellbeing Luton offers a Talking Therapy service and emotional health support. This service can be access by anyone who lives in Luton and is over 16.
HeadsUp is a campaign to help men get happy and stay happy. It has been set up to help men identify and deal with issues that tend to crop up in life from time to time. The website also offers help and advice to friends and family, so they can better support the men in their life.
CAMHS - Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service
CAMHS provides outpatient assessments, support and treatment for children and young people up to the age of 18 experiencing moderate to severe mental health problems. The service works to provide them with a greater knowledge of their condition and improve coping techniques.
Self-referrals are not accepted. Referrals are accepted from your GP, health professional, social worker, teacher, or youth worker.
If someone has seriously harmed themselves dial 999 immediately or take them to the nearest A&E department.
If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health crisis, you can contact any of the free helplines below:
NHS 111 Option 2
A 24-hour service for people aged 18 and over who are experiencing a mental health crisis.
Phone: 111 and select Option 2
Suffolk County Council - Support against Suicide
Follow website to find a variety of support systems. Whether this is to support someone who may feel suicidal, or whether it is yourself who has been affected by suicide. Support is available to help everyone emotionally and with practical manners.
Anyone can feel suicidal. So we need to be there for everyone. From advice on our website about issues you might be facing; through to free, confidential chats with our helpline staff, online or on the phone, we’re here for anyone who’s struggling, every single day of the year. No matter what.
Our helpline and webchat are open 365 days a year, offering practical suggestions for all of life’s problems - whether that’s anxiety, relationship concerns, health worries, money worries or suicidal thoughts. Our staff answer a call every 66 seconds - they listen, talk and help people struggling with life to make a plan so they can begin to look to the future.
Reach Out for Mental Health Reach Out for Mental Health supports individuals who experience suicidal thoughts, however it is not a crisis organisation. For those who are experiencing a mental health crisis call 999 or 111.